So there were two posts that brought this about. The Twisted Rope seems to have started this with On Being Broken, which was then replied to with When the Gods Push Too Far… by ganglerisgrove. Both are worth reads.

Now, I am apparently not a big name pagan. Not sure why, I’ve been around a really long time, been trying to get there. But then again, I did essentially take a year off. And I don’t share the “Party” political view. So I don’t get to travel in those circles and I don’t always know what’s happening to everyone. But I can relate to the whole thing about Gods pushing too far and being broken.

For a long time I had a close relationship with Freya. Then one day, thanks to the foul actions of an unmanly kistune, she turned on me. Declared me unworthy of the woman I loved, claimed my heart was dead and could not love, among other things. She, along with the Kistune, demanded I give up my love. Given the domains of Freya, especially her power over wealth, I found myself helpless to resist. The only way I was making ends meet was thanks to my Father, and to punish me would likely mean him suffering financially so that he could no longer help me. I had to choose, do I give up the woman I loved more than anything but sacrifice my Father, or do I protect an innocent person and sacrifice the greed of my dead heart?

So I gave in, gave up. I broke. I didn’t fight. I surrender to Freya’s will, lost my beloved, and protected my Father from the wrath of Freya and the Kami no Kitsune that inevitably would have occurred had I tried to fight them.

But I ended things with Freya. The sacred trust was broken, she had been well within her rights as my Patron. But just because you have the Right to do something, doesn’t mean you should. At the same time, however, it was clear she was acting on the advice of the Kitsune, council she and the rest of Asgard had reason to trust. Eventually, that trust was proven false, but that was another story.

So things like this happen. And you deal with them the best you can, or you walk away. One of the oldest wisdom I’ve heard when it comes to Old Pagans and Monotheists is “what happens if you piss off your one god, who do you turn to.” If a God wrongs you, one can generally bet that there’s another God who has a beef with them too, and the enemy of your enemy is at least a power you can get behind. Athena pissed at you? Turn to Poseidon, he’ll generally take any chance to fuck her over.

That being said, sometimes the breaking is good and should be endured. I’ve been breaking since I started and while Hel hasn’t always been responsible for the Breaking, she certainly has done what she can to profit from them. This hasn’t ended badly for me at all, at least not yet. But I can’t say it’s always been pleasant. But even when Freya turned on me ended up working out for me…in a way at least.

Continued in Part 2