So I was just going to do this as a reply in comments. But then as I was writing I realized what I have to say here is something I want published for all to see. So thanks again to draconusmajor for giving me a wonderful post idea.
I see no reason to pay you when your work is of arguably little value to me. You’re a curiosity. I neither like nor dislike what you wrote a few posts ago. Getting emotionally invested in your work would be pointless. No what interests me is your psychological evolution. How you have progressed, or perhaps regressed, in the last year. As I said prior, you went from having a broad range of topics to narrowing your focus so intensely that you’re in danger of becoming boring. What saves you is your reactivness. You eschew reflection in all but the most self pro-motive sense and you react in a marvelously diverse manner to the most inane of comments.
I have wondered and brought up in discussion with my peers that your relationship with your mother and your ex seems to have driven you into your adopted persona of a ‘God’ of Law. Interesting that it is Law and not Law & Justice/Order as most historical and even modern delusional self proclaimed ‘Gods’ have. It speaks to your lack of interest in the actions of Justice, You instead prefer the catharsis and the inactivity of the Letter of the Law. This could be either laziness or apathy on your part. I tend to lean toward Apathy.
My writing Challenges to you have been an attempt to garner new data, new reactions and perhaps as a side effect some reflection and personal growth from you. Your ‘Anti-authoritarian little brain’ (I quote) however seems to have had the same reaction you usually do if your posts are any indication. A somewhat child like response of ‘You can’t tell me what to do!’ It is only my imagination that adds the crossed arms and the petulant tone of an adolescent to the words I’m sure.
Now to my final point for this response; There are a multitude of non fiction sources for Faith in Humanity moments not least available if YouTube. With that point made here for your enjoyment (Or more likely for you to ignore) is a montage of moments.
So I have no value to you, being emotionally invested in my writings would be pointless, but I’m a curiosity for you to inspect and judge. You won’t pay me to write what you want, but you’ll insist I should write it anyways and when I refuse I’m a petulant child.
By the way, that whole “do what I want thing” isn’t with arms folded and a pout. It’s with a toast and a smirk.
Now, I have said repeatedly that my “domains” are law, justice, and retribution. I didn’t pick them, Hel did. But, I’m happy enough to go with them anyways. Frankly, I would have picked God of fanfiction and alchemy, or something like that, but Hel gives me a job and I do it. If you don’t like the jobs I get assigned….well, you already refused to pay me, so I do the work Hel commands. And I am perfectly interested in Justice, I work for Justice. I just don’t work for Social Justice. There’s a difference. And again, if you don’t like my “politics” I’m sorry, but they’re based off of what Hel has taught me. And believe me, if I became a God based on what my mother and my ex had done, it would have been a god of unholy violence that would have made Satan himself shit his pants in fear, not a god who believes in equality under the law and respect for his fellow human beings, with liberty and justice for all.
I would like to note that if I’m a narcissist for what I do/am/believe, then whatever it is that you’re doing here is far, far worse than that. Looking at another human being as if they were an experiment, something to judge and then look down upon because they don’t act/think/believe as you think should be done? I may be “Delusional” in the whole deity department, but I at least treat people like they’re human beings, not some little insect to be discussed over a proverbial dissection table while sipping wine and talking about how evolved I am. Which is exactly what you’re doing. You talk with your peers about how much better evolved you are as opposed to me and those like me.
So who is really delusional here? The me who believes he functions as a nexus of divine energies at the request of his Goddess, or the you who believes that i’m an inferior, regressed thing simply because I don’t think like you? I know which one you’re going to say, but I’ll leave it up to my other readers to decide. Certainly, you’re the one being arrogant and judgmental though. And I’ll take being a delusional man of faith over being an asshole who inherently thinks he’s better than people.
I’ve taken your little challenges and written from them because, you know what, it was kind of fun. Gave me something to write about. But it has been made pretty clear that you don’t even view me as an equal human being. I’m lesser than you. Because of who I am, because of what I think, because of what I believe, Hel, just because I spent a few blog posts writing in opposition to a totalitarian ideology you agree with, doesn’t matter. You are superior, and I am inferior, in your eyes.
And that’s not what this blog is for. This blog is to voice my mind, to honor Hel, to teach people Her ways, and to be an open place of respect for people of all faiths and philosohphies, so long as they honor their fellows as equal human beings.
Let me repeat that: This blog is an open place of respect and honor where everyone is to be viewed and treated as an equal human being.
Can there be disagreements? Of course, I welcome them. Echo chambers do not breed wisdom or knowledge. Can ideologies be questioned? They can and will, including my own. Can people, readers or writer be treated as a social experiment to remark upon how someone has “Regressed” or is “Delusional” or any other judgmental term so that the speaker may feel better about themselves?
Hela. Fucking. No.
So if my work is so base and worthless to you. Leave. If you cannot stand someone disagreeing with you. Leave. If you want to sit there with your “peers” and have yourself a merry laugh at the stupid Pagan because he believes his Goddess, his Pantheon, and Others raised him up to do a job they needed done, there are plenty of other blogs out there like mine. You can can take your judgmental asses and find another one to read. Because neither I, nor my readers, are here for your pedantic, self righteous amusement. You can take that superiority stick out of your ass and evolve some humility and respect for your fellow human beings.
But just this once, with Hela’s permission, I’m going to break that respect rule. Because not only am I what Hel makes me in regards to Law, Justice, and Retribution, I do believe in practicing justice, and that means letting the scales hang even for your actions. For the entertainment of my other readers, and for myself, I’m going to drop some Justice and Retribution here in front of everyone. As you have done unto me and mine, I now do unto you.
So before you go, let me drop some of that psychology 101 bullshit you’ve been spouting at yourself.
You have a username with no blog attached, which tells me that you’re one of those people who acts tough on the internet, but in real life is probably a bit of a coward. You clearly have a problem with people who don’t believe like you and you won’t put up your own ideas in a place where they can be viewed, which tells me that as much as you’re gung ho for them you’re also deeply insecure about them being questioned.
You like to think you’re better than people, and have sought out my blog, and I would guess others, to read that you find entertaining in such a way as to make you feel superior to those you read. You like to dictate challenges, so you clearly think you’re more intelligent than those you challenge, and yet you feel entitled to their work without giving them reward. Which tells me your an egotistical narcissist with delusions of grandeur, possibly with some light sociopathy.
You like to discuss such things with your “peers” which indicates that they are not, in fact, your friends and you probably have some deep seated fears that they will shun you, should you fail to prove you’re up to their standards. But you know, one day, you will slip and they will look down at you just like you’ve looked down on so many others. So you try harder and harder to laugh at those beneath you, thinking it will save you.
You’re incapable of respecting anyone who does not believe as you do. Clearly, your position on issues is the correct one and anyone who disagrees with you and refuses to learn is someone Else. The Other, as psychologists like to put it. They may create works that entertain you, but they will never be like you. Much like a white supremacist watching a native american powwow. Look at the colorful idiots dance in their make believe worlds.
And lastly, you will likely deny every analysis I have made of your psyche, as well as my challenge to reveal your true self. Because to do so would risk slipping the mask of superiority you have built for yourself here. You would be made mortal, amongst mortal men, your flaws laid bare as I have laid my flaws bare. And you could never stand to lower yourself down to the level of a lesser creature like me. Instead, you’ll stand on the proverbial beach and throw stones.
Because you’re a scared little human afraid to swim with the sharks.